TOXIC TEARS

VERSE I
I promise my tears are toxic so don’t taste
there inflicted by the absence of society’s embrace
I’m sure I just emptied my trash yesterday
now it’s overflowin’ wit tissue, I wish you
would be here to clear fear, help me make it through this
all this pain would fade away with 1 kiss
your lips I cherish—please don’t blush, don’t be embarrassed
conformity—not an option, my pen has been my only friend

PRE-CHORUS
I don’t know why I can’t tell Hell from Heaven
when I look up in the sky and wonder why I can’t smell my reflection

VERSE II
invisible boundaries found me, I’m drowning within myself
so throw me a life preserver, I’m almost out of breath,
but to hell with it, I can’t quit it’s gotten a grip of me
I’m diligently, slowly drifting from reality
a fallacy—taking over closure blinding eyes
can’t see, but believe, I’ll be intellectually perceived
feelin’ red when things are green—there’s no yellow to ever warn me
YIELD 80 PROOF TRUTH is ruthlessly comin’
I’m runnin’, sprintin’, hittin’, never missin’—dead on
gotta pessimistic positive vibe intertwined in my dome
I’ve thrown too many things away, experienced pain and I know
it might be wrong, but I think it’s best to be left with less—life is so
overwhelming, hell will melt me—stress’ll be the death of me
compulsively obsessive, misplacin’ happiness’ recipe
worry is the darkroom, in which negatives can develop…
and my pain is exposed

CHORUS
as I step to the edge—I say and I pray
Lord, help me rise above this tide—I feel I can’t
oh, I feel I can’t…no…

VERSE III
I see you swimmin’ in my eyes—don’t drown
you’re divin’ into a pool of blue polluted by a golden crown
that surrounds the deepest, darkest part of me—PITCH BLACK
near is white laced with red, representing tears shed
inflicted by confusion, frustration, and fear
the same emotions approachin’ me daily, rarely cleared
prepared, a trait that I hold very dear,
but at the same time a trait that I can’t seem to grab
and I taste no salt, just intense flavors of Lavender
I’ve tripped into a hallway I didn’t mean to open up
all loss, nothing gained, tears drop, liquid pain
recycled silver tears get smeared into my soul
what we do in life echoes in eternity—I’ve heard,
but I ain’t feelin’ Bible revisions—interpretations inferred,
but I know a lotta kneelin’ keeps me in good standin’
I gotta have hope my Uncle Bill’s straight chillin’ in Heaven

CHORUS

PRE-CHORUS

CHORUS

OUTRO
the only thing stopping me is a thought of the past
I had a talk with my Mother when a straw had cracked my back
and…as she cried hysterically, she asked how I could be so selfish
suicide affects everyone that loves you—and that idea stayed with me
and she saved me, but still the thought pierces frequently,
but thank you Mother, I love you ‘til the end of my days…
…eh, eh…yall know time’s passin’—right? fast-like
we ain’t got no time to be negative and dwell in the dark
stayin’ busy helps me—
you just gotta push yourself to have fun every once in a while